i'm alive...i just wish my life would stop being so complicated..or that i wouldn't hold everything in so much. blah. i feel like breaking down. these foster kids are tearing my family apart, and i can't take it anymore. i'm losing sleep, i've had nonstop headaches since they came, and my grades are slipping...big time.

i need to sit down and have some serious talks with someone..but she's going through too much grief of her own right now for me to bother her with my pathetic problems.

what do you do for someone who's dad has just died? what do you do for yourself when everything is crashing down around you? what do you do when everyone around you is laughing, including you, but you're crying on the inside? and how the HELL do you make kids realize that before we took them in, they had absolutely nothing..and then make them appreciate everything we've sacrificed instead of them wanting more?

other than all that shit, my life has been decent..except for some of the stuff that's happened, the confusion and anger..all that good stuff. i just thought i'd let you guys know i'm still alive..and i expect to hear back from you